I realized that the below post might have made it sound like I was not oh-so-excited for the lil' bundle of joy that is headed our way in roughly 16 weeks. This is not the case at all...we are beyond thrilled to meet our little one but it has definitely been a path of ups and downs. I promised Bill that I wouldn't turn this into a baby blog but it seems babies (or at least one baby in particular) is always on my mind lately. Plus I am terribly neglectful of this blog as it is and would like to find a new way to keep it up. So I thought I'd talk a little bit about the pregnancy so far and our battle with insurance and doctors. I'd love to hear about your experiences.
I guess I'll start by saying that I have always, always, always wanted to be a mom. Ever since I can remember I've loved the idea of having children. But I also knew I wanted them at a certain time and place in my life. I'm not sure if there would ever have a been a right time but it seems like in everyone else's mind the moment you turn 30 is when you should start popping 'em out. The funny thing was I turned 30 and I wasn't really sure anymore. I was in a pretty good place with my career and I really wanted to focus on that and I wanted things with my husband's career to get more settled before starting a family. Of course, it would be about this time that the universe decided that we would just have to figure all that stuff out AND have a baby. So needless to say, when I found out I was pregnant I was happy but I was also completely overwhelmed. Especially in the first trimester, I was sick and tired 24 hours a day and on top of that I was battling some serious baby blues. I've always been prone to periods of sadness and I also get very anxious about change. My neurotic, worrisome behavior was in full effect. Not helping at all was the fact that our insurance company was being a pain in the arse about authorizations and letting me see the OB/GYN. I had my initial appointment and then it took 4 months to get the medical group to send the authorization for the full pre-natal care. That is a lot of days stressing over what could go wrong. I just tried to be as healthy as possible and be as informed as possible hoping that everything would be OK.
Miraculously, the moment I hit the 2nd trimester the depression I had been feeling totally went away. So did the nausea (replaced with never-ending hunger). We finally got to see the doctor again, had all of my blood tests (all good) and had our first 3-D ultrasound. This little girl is already super, duper tall! She's got super long legs and gorilla feet just like her mama. I've definitely been enjoying the past few weeks. I love being able to feel her move around (which she does a lot of)...it's like my favorite thing ever. I can understand how other mommies miss that but I'm really excited to meet Eleanor too and can't wait for her to make her debut.
I would love to hear about your experiences...did you ever feel depressed, overwhelmed? Or was it 9 months of total bliss?
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